Once there was a good Quaker. She subscribed to Friends Journal and read all the FCNL action emails. She served as clerk of Coffee and Oversight Committee when asked to, and gave regularly to AFSC. She had raised all her children as Quakers, and one still even went to meeting! In short she was an exemplary Friend. And the Light came to her and gave her a powerful leading to wear a bright-orange traffic cone on her head as a hat.
“If ever there were a time to test one’s leadings,” the exemplary Friend said to herself, and ignored it.
But the leading did not go away. She knew she had to wear a bright-orange traffic cone on her head as a hat.
The Friend began to dread going into Meeting for Worship because of this overwhelming feeling, and then she began to dread going past road construction. So one day in worship she started talking to the Light. “Look,” she said, “I’ll do extra. I was going to buy another Volvo, but instead I’ll get a Prius. I’ll give more money to AFSC, and to my meeting, and to the Orphaned Meerkat Fund.”
The Light responded, “That all sounds fine, so long as you also wear a traffic cone on your head.”
“Okay. I’ll cut back on my hours at work and spend more time on Quaker projects. I won’t buy a new car at all. I’ll double all my contributions.”
“Sounds great,” the Light said, “if you’re wearing the traffic cone while you do it.”
The exemplary Friend, in a near panic, made a final offer. “I’ll quit my job and volunteer for FCNL full-time! I won’t pay my taxes! I’ll sell my Volvo, my TV, and my whole house, and give all the money to my taxes! I’ll serve on Nominating Committee!”
“Awesome! And how does the traffic cone fit in?”
The Friend broke down in tears. “What do I have to do?”
The Light replied, “You can do whatever you chose to do, as long as you do it while wearing a bright-orange traffic cone on your head as a hat.”
“But everyone will look at me!” the exemplary Friend wailed.
The Light, sounding puzzled, said, “Well, of course. Why else would I have you do it?”